Forget about that glittering ceremony at Westminster Abbey on April 29. Let’s talk about what really matters – the wedding memorabilia.
Of course, there are a few mugs bearing pictures of William and Kate with the place and date, but the only one I’d like to buy is the wonderfully naff one featuring Harry‘s face instead of his brother’s. The Chinese designer who created that really is a big mug.
Apart from that, I haven’t seen much that I would like to keep and hand down to my future grandchildren.
Prince Charles’ online Highgrove shop is selling a William and Kate jigsaw for £29.95 but I know I would lose vital pieces of it within a few weeks, so it’s not for me.
Moorcroft have produced a traditional vase costing £480 ($770.45) which is a bit outside most people’s budgets and it doesn’t even feature the bridal couple, just a floral design.
No, I am looking for something that screams ‘royal wedding‘, preferably something out of the ordinary.
I hear that the Potteries are busy churning out commemorative tankards and plates, but I don’t want any of those. Something more fun is what I had in mind.
A German company has been producing royal tea bags for some time featuring the Queen’s head on cardboard arms extending on either side of a cup with the teabag dangling beneath in the hot water.
The manufacturers Donkey Products GmbH & Co. have now issued ‘Katea (geddit?) and William’ teabags which I can’t save for the future as I note on the packaging the words ‘Best before 2.2014′.
A friend of mine was given a pair of woolly gloves for her birthday last week. On one hand was embroidered the name Kate and on the other the word Wills. They are cute and cosy but as I regularly lose gloves within days of buying them, I suspect these would be a waste of money for me.
Thirty years ago it was so different when Charles and Diana got married. I remember a few of my journalist colleagues joined me on a visit to the Design Centre in London and we were really spoiled for choice.
To this day I still cherish several 1981 royal wedding items which I bought there. I especially love a mug in the shape of Prince Charles’ head, with one ear as the handle.
Inscribed on the side of his face is a short poem by the renowned wit, critic and TV presenter Clive James. It goes like this:
‘Whatever beverage brims in this cup
Thank God and Prince Charles when you pick it up.
And as you quaff it bless that same Grand Planner
Who gave him for a bride the fair Diana.’
Well, that marriage didn’t last but the cup has. I heard recently that it is now worth upwards of £70 and I paid less than a fiver.
I also cherish a game I can only describe as a sort of solitaire. It features a circular board on which is a drawing of Charles and Diana in evening dress. Scattered on its surface are 17 fake diamonds which you jiggle until they drop into small holes forming a tiara on Diana’s head, her earrings, and shiny epaulettes on the Prince’s shoulders.
It has helped me to waste many happy hours over the past three decades, although I have never managed to get every single ‘diamond’ into its correct spot.
Doubt if I’ll ever find something like that this year but I am quite keen on five royal wedding plates with jokey messages such as IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME and THANKS FOR THE DAY OFF.
I’m just off to Hoxton Square London to get some now at the KK Outlet shop!