More and more, planning a wedding just seems like the experience of trying to find a flat to rent in London. You’ve got to be quick off the mark with things or else they might be snapped up by the person who’s looking at them after you.
That horrible feeling you get when the estate agent tells you: “Well I wouldn’t think about it too long if I were you because I’ve got more people coming round to view it in two hours” is exactly the same as the one you get when a wedding-related company tells you: “We have other couples who’ve made enquiries about your date, so you should confirm soon if you want it.”
The only difference is that I always suspected those pesky estate agents were lying to beat their co-workers to a fat commission check, but I believe every word these caterers, photographers and so on say.
Why would they lie? They hardly seem short on people requiring their services.
When I’m waiting to hear from one of them re: availability or prices, I turn into a love sick teenager – obsessively checking my phone and email every five minutes to see if they’ve got back to me.
If I didn’t know myself better I’d say that I’m doing what I promised myself I would never do – getting stressed.
In my first ever post I wrote “I don’t really feel like the whole focus of my life has changed”. But now I realise that’s because I hadn’t even started thinking about the planning. Now it’s hard not to. But how do you switch off, that’s what I’d like to know?
I just want everything to be perfect. Take the photographer for example – that was one of the most important things to me.
After seeing my friend Gemma’s lovely pics, I knew I wanted something like that – more arty and fashion than simple and classic. But finding a photographer like that is hard.
Linda has a snapper who’s done all of J’s siblings’ weddings, but her photographs – though lovely – were just too straightforward for my liking.
I found one girl who I really liked, but I dithered, and by the time I went to book her, she was already taken. Seven months in advance! She gave me the details of two more photographers who looked equally as good, but I got in touch with them both, and they were also busy.
By this time I began to panic. Have I left it too late, I thought? Will I end up with my dad and his disposable camera?
But then an email dropped into my inbox from a photographer in Valencia, and everything was sorted. He’d been passed my details by one of the other photographers who couldn’t do my wedding.
This guy took pity on me after I said oh what a shame, thanks anyway, but could he please please recommend someone, anyone in the same style as I was “pasando una pesadilla” (having a nightmare) trying to find someone. He said he would help me, and he kept his word.
I checked out the photographer in Valencia’s portfolio and prices, and was very impressed, so at the insistence of Linda, I called him up immediately – at 11am on a Saturday morning.
I now have a photographer. And after this whole episode I also have a ‘take no prisoners’ approach to wedding planning. Maybe that’s the secret to not being stressed?