Learning That Children Cry… and that’s okay!
As a new mum I used to find myself going out in fear that Buzz would have an almighty meltdown in public and annoy the surrounding humans trying to enjoy their day… in the event that this occurred I used to hang my head in shame at my inability to keep the little man continuously happy 24/7. Firstly I’d sheepishly grab for his dummy. Yes. That’s right – in my moment of need I’d reach for that devilish little object designed to pacify upset babies that has attracted snobbery from those really-good-mums-who-know-exactly-how-to-read-their-offspring… needless to say, they’re far superior to mums like me who use it as a plug to stop the flowing wails – all the while frantically trying to work out what could possibly be the root of the problem. I imagine it’s a similar feeling to trying to dismantle a ticking bomb – my fingers would become clumsy as I faffed with his clothes (checking he wasn’t too hot or cold), sniffed his nappy (he could’ve done an almighty poop) and rubbed his back to check he hadn’t got wind (gas hurts). All the while I’d be spotting people watching me in my peripheral vision and would be sure I could hear tuts of annoyance… My cheeks would redden and I’d start getting all hot and sweaty. Although, thanks to my hormones and breastfeeding, this seems to be a regular state of being anyway – so nothing new on that score.
Well, this occurred when we went for our anniversary meal in Manchester’s Rosso restaurant this week (Yes, even after Buzz’s meltdown in the same restaurant last week, we decided to go back – the food was that good!). Luckily, during this mini meltdown, we knew Buzz wanted feeding, but we still had to calm the hungry boy while we heated up his milk – let’s face it, five minutes is just too long to wait when you’re starving, so no wonder he wasn’t happy with the service Tom and I were providing!
As expected, people were looking over and I was sure the lady behind me was annoyed… cue the attractive reddening and the sweaty pits (seriously, even my knee pits have started leaking). Fast forward half an hour and the lady kindly turned in her seat to tell me how gorgeous Buzz was. This led me to guiltily say sorry for his crying. She laughed and simply said with a shrug, ‘Children cry’, before continuing to tell me never to feel like I have to apologise for it. Not only did her words fill me with relief but the fact that I’d thought she was irritated by Buzz when she was actually admiring him left me puzzled. I know there are still people out there who get annoyed with the screams of a baby (who has no other form of communication to express his wants and desires) – but there are other people out there who understand. It’s the notion that these people exist that led me to laugh and smile with Buzz when he had a similar meltdown (again, over being fed) a few days later at a service station. Instead of hanging my head in shame and embarrassment I looked around me and into the eyes of the people glancing at me. It surprised me to see kindness. Yes, kindness and the knowing looks of people who’ve also battled with their own demanding mini humans. I can’t express how though looks lifted my heart. I vow to spread that kindness whenever I see another in such a predicament.
Screaming babies aside (Buzz is actually very good, he just choses great times to go into panic mode), this week has been full of loveliness. Not only did I have a wonderful time celebrating two years of marriage with my gorgeous husband, but I also spent a lot of time with our families. I’d love to say that they missed me while I was in Manchester for two weeks, but, let’s face it – it was Buzz they wanted to squeeze. Nonetheless, it’s been great to be surrounded by them all and watch Buzz flash them his smiles – melting their hearts even further.
The week ahead promises more excitement as Thursday is the official publication day for ‘You’re the One That I Want’. I’ll be full of nerves thinking of people reading my creation and delving into my imagination… Aaah! Fingers crossed it goes well.
Hope you’ve made the most of the weather this week – there’s nothing like being out in the sunshine!
Have a good one!